NVE and the NKBA Commish

With the stinging memory of his ignominious exit last week, NVE headed off to NKBA fully determined to stay cramp-free the entire night.  After arriving 10 minutes early to do some cursory stretching and get some pre-game airballs out of the way, the door opened and in walked the NKBA commissioner, eeriely reminiscent of this (in a 48 year old 5'5" Asian sort of way):

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3146/2593639839_19f7af104a.jpg

NVE: Hi

Commish: Oh, I didn't know you were coming

NVE: Ken said it was okay to come, and that he'd let you know

Commish (not making eye contact): I need to know if people are coming.

NVE: Oh sorry, if you guys are full, I don't have to run

Commish: I just need to know if people are coming

Yikes.

Come gametime (after 9 of us waited around for 15 minutes waiting for a 10th to show up), NVE weighed the pros/cons of pulling a symbolic Ricky Eff and leaving, but decided to head over to Commish to put in his $5 pay-to-play.

NVE: Thanks for letting me play

Commish: Ok.  And by the way, you carry the ball.  People will call that

Double yikes.  You know who I miss right now?  http://lahrdc.com/assets/staffimages/rastegar.jpg

A suitable monikor for the afforementioned NKBA Commish is pending.

Joining NVE: PB&J (Persian Burper in Jorts...although no jean shorts this time, but sporting cargo shorts), Asian Short Round #1, Asian Short Round #2, and a bull-like power forward Chinese guy wearing goggles and possessing a beautiful mid-range set shot from the elbows in.  He's not Korean, but I shall call him (C)Ho-Grant.  As the game got underway, NVE decided that he would stay under the radar; perhaps he had been a little too aggressive the week before and rubbed people the wrong way.  On the 3rd possession, NVE took the ball on a outlet and headed down court on a 2v2 break at full speed.  Who should stand in his way, but the Commish.  The thought crossed NVE's mind...you know what's coming

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7Er_-XZW4E

Rather than utilizing his 40 lb weight advantage to re-enact NVE v Ron Pham's nose (http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_-DSk2dwUb04/S_rLsBrBgWI/AAAAAAAABCo/dwjXwMM1GdE/s1600/nash-broken-nose-1.jpeg), NVE settled for a floating layup and jogged back downcourt via the higher road.  The rest of the game (to 20 this week, by twos and threes...apparently they just pick a random number to play to week?!) and evening, for that matter, was wholly unremarkable, filled mostly with a flurry of mid-range shots by Cho Grant.  However, the night did end on a high note, with something very similar to this: 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qzteG9-a_AA 

Here's a handy translation chart:

Randy Foye = Asian Short Round #1

Blake Griffin = NVE

Chris Kaman = PB&J

10 enormous black guys on the court = 10 Asian midgets

60 foot pass = 10 foot pass

Dunk = Layup that just barely made it over the rim

40 inch vertical = 4 inch vertical

2 defenders in paint = 1 defender with half a foot in the paint

Graceful landing = Landing with an ass-plant

Look for the highlight, coming soon to an And1 mix tape.